


Up the Ante

by X_bladeMaster



Series: Joker in the Pack [1]
Category: Persona 4, Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Non-Canonical Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 07:21:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30035091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/X_bladeMaster/pseuds/X_bladeMaster
Summary: Ren's Journey was a hard one, with a traitorous Justice and a meddling God. Luckily, the Trickster's Fool has had his own journey, and can help him get through it.(Or, P5 protag/P4 protag Confidant, with some added angst because why not)
Relationships: Amamiya Ren & Narukami Yu, Amamiya Ren & Seta Souji
Series: Joker in the Pack [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2209482
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	Up the Ante

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [One More Day](https://archiveofourown.org/works/183197) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account). 



> 'This won't be too long', I said. 'Just a short prologue to set up my bigger, more detailed story', I said. 'It won't take me too long', I said. ...Three days later, on five hours of sleep, 'my god what even is this'.  
> So, this is the set-up to a much longer story that I've been working on ever since I finished P4 Golden. I hope to get the first chapter up soon, but knowing me as well as I do, it'll probably take a while.

Ren’s first encounter with Narukami Souji wasn’t actually an encounter at all. He’d been wandering around the bustling shopping district of his new town when he’d heard a couple of housewives mumble something about ‘that poor Narukami boy’. He, newly twelve years old, hadn’t paid it any attention and turned instead to the nearby shrine. The people of the town of Inaba had fond things to say about Tastuhime Shrine, and even fonder things to say about its guardian fox and ‘silver spirit’ assistant. He didn’t really believe in ghosts, but he did like foxes. And if it was a guardian, it was probably used to people. Maybe it would even let him pet it.

He didn’t find the fox that day. In fact, he didn’t see it at all until the news spread about the Junes department store closing. The people in the shopping district seemed to have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, they’d hated Junes for stealing all the business; on the other, the reason it was closing was apparently because of the unexplained deaths of a group of teens just last spring. Deaths that included the branch managers son.

That was when he’d met the fox. She’d appeared out of nowhere, jumping down from the roof of the shrine’s main hall, a blank ema in her mouth. She’d placed it at his feet, barked at him, and vanished. He’d…really had no idea how to process that, but though he’d gone back, each time with the blank ema in hand, she’d never appeared before him again, and he’d never been able to return the ema.

It became something of a lucky charm, over the years. Something the shrine guardian had given to him, on a day the whole town had been covered by an unshakable gloom, and it was probably only silly superstition but some childish part of him believed he’d been chosen for something, that Inari themself had sent one of their messengers to give him a destiny.

Childish, he knew. But four years later, being sent away on probation after being arrested on false charges, he placed the ema in the inside pocket of his bag to keep it safe, just in case there came a time when he needed it.

* * *

Meiji Shrine was much, much bigger than Tatsuhime Shrine, and much more crowded. It almost seemed like there were more people in this small area of city than there were people in Inaba. Even after four months, his poor country heart couldn’t handle it, and he ended up separated from Ann in the crowd. Morgana, the traitor, had been riding around on her shoulders, and so for the first time in what felt like forever, Ren was well and truly on his own.

“Great,” he grumbled, digging for his phone and trying to find an out of the way place to send Ann a distress signal. He eventually found a sparsely populated area, the only other around a silver-haired young man. “Great,” he hissed again when he realized his bad habits had resulted in his phone not getting charged, and was thus deader than dead at the moment.

“Are you alright?” Ren startled at the question, clutching his phone to his chest as the stranger spoke, a strangely wistful smile on his face. “You seem a bit troubled.”

Normally, Ren was not one to talk to strangers. But there was something about this one—something that screamed that as strange as he was, he was also _familiar_ —that made his normal hesitance fade away. “It’s just dead, is all,” Ren replied, relaxing slightly. “I was going to send for a rescue, but I guess I’m just going to have to wait until she finds me, because I’m not going back out into _that_.”

At that, the man laughed. “Not used to cities?” he guessed, and Ren nodded emphatically.

“I’m pretty sure there’s more people here in the shrine than there is in all of Inaba,” he blurted out, and it was the man’s turn to startle.

“You’re from Inaba?” he asked, genuinely curious, like he knew it existed. Rare, for someone who lived in the city. Most people from outside Inaba who knew about Inaba normally only knew about it because of the Hanged Man murder case, but there was curiosity and a strange sort of _longing_ in the man’s eyes that spoke of something far more familiar than that.

Ren nodded again. “Yeah. I…don’t think I’ve ever seen you there?” He hadn’t but there was something, _something_ … His eyes flicked up to the man’s hair and something clicked. “Wait, are you the guy who used to help the fox with the shrine requests?”

The man laughed again, delight flaring in his eyes. “I’m surprised that story’s still going around.”

Ren grinned himself. “You’re practically an urban legend now, ‘Silver Spirit-san’.”

He choked on his laughter before it doubled in strength. “Oh my god, is that really what they call me? _Why_ , that’s so _random_.” There was more laughter before the man straightened up, making eye contact and surprising Ren when he found himself staring into eyes not unlike his own. “My actual name is Narukami Souji, and please, please, _never_ call me that ridiculous moniker ever again.”

“I make no promises, Spirit-san,” was Ren’s answer, having to muffle his own laughter at the look of reluctant amusement on Narukami-san’s face. From the depths of his soul and in the back of his mind, he heard the rattling of chains.

_I am thou, thou art I_

_Thou has obtained a new vow_

_It shall become the wings of rebellion_

_That breaketh thy chains of captivity_

_With the birth of the Fool arcana_

_I have obtained the winds of blessing_

_That shall lead to freedom and new power_

Sure. He could live with this. Narukami-san was much less annoying than Akechi, anyways.

* * *

Outside of the other Thieves and Boss, Narukami-san quickly became his favorite person in Tokyo. The man was a breath of fresh air in a city that moved far too quickly for Ren’s taste, and he was always ready and willing to go fishing. Ren had never been very good at it, despite his constant presence at the Samegawa riverbank, but under Narukami-san’s tutelage he was quickly becoming a master.

“I used to feed the strays back home,” Narukami-san told him. “My uncle was always complaining about the cats in the driveway, but they made Nanako happy, so he was never serious about it.”

When Haru’s father died, Ren found himself dialing that now familiar number and asking the other, very quietly, if he’d seen the news. “He was my friend’s dad,” he whispered. “I don’t know…what I’m supposed to do now. I don’t know what, what I’m supposed to say, Narukami-san, it-“ _It was my fault_ , he choked down, because that wasn’t something he could tell Narukami-san.

Narukami-san was silent for a long while before he spoke. “Don’t let her walk alone,” he finally said. “She doesn’t need to be coddled, or treated like glass, but let her know you’re there. Say it once; prove it always. And that’s—that’s all you can do, Ren-kun. It’ll be hard—for all of you. Death always is. But moving forward…is all you can ever do.”

_He knows death intimately_ , Ren realized. He didn’t quite manage to keep his newfound knowledge out of his voice when he said, “Thank you, Souji-san.”

* * *

The closer they came to Akechi’s deadline, the more Ren’s mind raced, and the worse he got at fishing. Souji-san, close enough now to be considered one of Ren’s closest friend’s despite the five-year age gap, didn’t have much difficulty figuring out something was on his mind. “It’s…not really something you can help with,” Ren finally admitted, after Souji-san gave The Stare of Disappointment. “I’m just nervous, that’s all.” Because everything was depending on getting Makoto’s sister on his side, and though he trusted Queen with his life, his bare interactions with Niijima-san hadn’t filled him with any fondness.

But his other option was to give up.

_Was your previous decision a mistake then?_

_Like hell it was._

He would never give up and walk away, not then and especially not now, when his friends were depending on him to pull this off.

“I might surprise you, kid,” Souji-san said, and there was something soft in his voice that made Ren wonder what he’d gone through to put it there. “Come on.” Souji-san stood up and reeled in his line. “Your head’s not here, so we might as well go get some food. How do you feel about beef bowls?”

* * *

It was November twenty-first. Maybe. Ren wasn’t sure, everything was still kind of hazy; whatever had been in those drugs had been _strong_. Or maybe it was just the amount they’d shot into his bloodstream that was messing with his head. Whatever it was, Takemi-sensei had been _pissed_ , and had also banned him from painkillers until she was sure everything had been flushed from his system, which sucked. Because pain was all he was right now.

Still, hurting or not, his friends would be coming over soon, and he wanted to be alright for them. Sojiro hadn’t opened Leblanc today; for once, his insistence on not keeping regular hours and closing whenever he felt like it was being helpful. No one in the neighborhood would think anything of it, and that would keep the police from being suspicious. So it was perfectly fine for him to struggle his way downstairs, despite Morgana’s protesting meows.

“We’re not having the meeting in my room,” he muttered. “I need an actual chair to sit in, or I’m going to fall over, and that’ll make them panic.”

Morgana sighed before hopping up to sit on their usual table. “Fine, but after the meeting you’re going right back to bed.”

And since everything hurt and he didn’t really feel like arguing, Ren easily agreed.

The meeting started off well enough; all his friends were ecstatic to see him, alive even if ‘well’ wasn’t anywhere in his vicinity. There was much to tell Niijima-san and Boss both; they’d gotten different parts of the story, Niijima-san a cold and clinical rundown and Boss the more volatile, emotional parts that came from almost-dying on a regular basis. Reconciling the two pieces wasn’t fun for any of them. And then, Futaba played the clip, the clip she’d lifted from her bug on Akechi’s phone, and Ren had never seen Boss’s face that pale.

Niijima-san too. Her face was bone white and she looked _devastated_. She, like Ren, had probably considered Akechi and friend and confidant, and so to find out that this was what he was hiding beneath his pleasant mask was hitting her hard.

However, that was when the easy part ended, because that was when the door flew open, the bell jingling wildly. Everyone spun to face the door—why hadn’t Boss _locked_ _it_ —and Ren felt his mouth fall open at the man standing there, breathing hard like he’d run there all the way from Shibuya and looking like he was fighting back tears.

Open surprise flickered across the man’s face before it twisted in…something that wasn’t exactly rage but was uncomfortably close to it. “You fucking _brat_ ,” Souji-san snarled, crossing the room in three quick strides and yanking Ren out of the booth to pull him into a bone-crushing hug before anyone could react. “You goddamned motherfucking _brat_ , how could you do that to me?!”

“Souji-san?!” Ren sputtered, getting a mouthful of sweater. From where it lay wrapped around the sea of his soul, the chain of the Fool was rattling, almost trembling like a live thing, too many emotions to sift through emanating from it. _Relief_ was loudest, drowning out the sorrow and disbelief he could feel from his other bonds, muted as they were with distance. “Wha-what are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here?” Souji-san parroted. “ _What am I doing here_!? I turned on the news this morning to _that_ ,” and based on the movement Ren could feel he assumed Souji-san was gesturing to the muted television in the corner, still playing the news of his ‘suicide’, but he couldn’t tell for sure with his face still buried in Souji-san’s shoulder. “And then you weren’t answering your phone!” Guiltily, Ren thought back to the night before, Niijima-san handing him his phone and him being too tired and broken to bother looking for the charger, instead opting to fall right into bed.

Souji-san’s breathing was coming alarmingly fast, now, and Ren was starting to get worried. “I didn’t…know you knew,” was his lame excuse, trying to wriggle free from the hug without aggravating any bruises. Considering he was one big bruise, and Souji-san wasn’t inclined to let go, he failed spectacularly.

“I’m not an _idiot_ , you damn kid,” the man hissed, holding tighter. Ren gave up on getting away, slumping against Souji-san when his leg decided to give out on him. Souji-san, not expecting the added weight of a lanky teenager, stumbled, and hands reached out from all around to steady them both. “Shit, Ren, what the hell _happened_?”

He’d never heard Souji-san curse so much, not even when a rather large fish had pulled him right off the docks and into the pond one rainy afternoon. “I have new reasons to hate the police,” he mumbled, more exhausted than ever. “Can we sit? Please?” It took a few more prodding minutes to get Souji-san to release his hold, and even after Ren had been returned to the booth he refused to move from his side. The guilt was practically eating him alive, and he mentally promised that he’d plug his phone in as soon as he got upstairs so he could tell everyone else he was alive.

Oh god, Shinya was probably frantic, he was only _eleven_.

“Uh, Futaba?” Ren asked, deciding waiting was an idiotic thing to do. “Could you plug my phone in for me? I should…not let them keep thinking I’m dead, or Hifumi’s going to kill me for real.” Futaba eyed Souji-san warily but hopped out of the booth to do as he’d asked. Chihaya-san…might already know, with her cards, but Ohya might try to drink herself to death, and Yoshida-san—Ren didn’t think the man would give up, not now, but grief did funny things to people. And _fuck_ , Yuuki was going to panic—wait, he’d had class with Ann, had she told him? “Ann, did Yuuki…?”

Ann went white. “We forgot to tell him.” Well, there went that hope.

Iwai could handle it; the man was ex-yakuza, people died around him all the time, so he was low on Ren’s priority list. “Boss-“

“Kawakami is aware you’re alive,” Boss cut him off, nursing a cup of coffee like he wished it was something stronger. “When she asked if the news was true, I told her not to believe everything she was told. And as far as the school’s concerned, you had a family emergency you had to return home for.”

“Okay,” Ren mumbled, pushing his glasses up to rub at his eyes. “Okay that’s…that’s good, so I just gotta tell Yuuki and Yoshida-san and Chihaya-san and Ohya and Hifumi and Shinya, oh god I have to tell Shinya, that’s not gonna be fun, and I should probably tell Iwai too, and Kawakami-sensei would probably like confirmation, and I _think_ that’s everybody who doesn’t already know.”

Souji-san’s hand hadn’t left his shoulder, and he could feel the man shaking. Yeah. Ren was going to feel guilty for _forever_. He _knew_ Souji-san had lost someone before, his words when Okumura had died had been confirmation of that, and Ren had _still_ let the man think he was dead.

“So who’s this guy?” Futaba asked from her hiding spot behind Yusuke.

Souji-san answered before Ren could open his mouth. “I’m his Fool,” he announced, like he expected them to know what that meant. Boss and Niijima-san didn’t, of course, but his Magician, his Chariot, his Lovers, his Priestess, his Emperor, his Empress, his Hermit, they _did_.

Ren gaped at him. “How…do you know that?”

Souji-san looked at him, something achingly fond and unbearably sad in his eyes as he said, “Because you’re mine.” Ren stiffened in shock at the admission. “You are my Fool and I am yours, and when I saw the news…” His hand spasmed, his grip turning painful. “I thought I’d lost yet another of my bonds. Don’t—I can’t do that again kid, you can’t _do that_ to me again.”

Ren was horrified. “I’m so _sorry_ ,” he whispered, for scaring him and whatever happened to make him lose something so precious, he was so, _so_ sorry. “I didn’t—it’s a lame excuse, I know, and I’m sorry but I didn’t think you knew, and I—I didn’t know you were—I didn’t know you _knew_ , or that I was…I didn’t know I was _yours_.”

Boss’s face was getting steadily more confused as Ren’s ramblings went on, but Niijima-san was the one to speak. “What are the two of you talking about?”

“I am thou, thou art I,” Ren mumbled, rapidly losing energy after—everything. He hadn’t had much to begin with, what with the whole ‘recovering from being beaten half to death’ thing, and this emotional whiplash drained the rest of what he had pretty thoroughly. “I-I’m _tired_.” He slumped sideways, and Souji-san moved his hand so his arm was wrapped around Ren and he was tucked in to the older man’s side, and Ren’s sluggish mind found it a perfectly acceptable place to take a nap.

The last thing he heard was “How much have these kids told you about Personas?”

* * *

So.

Souji-san was apparently a Persona user.

He was a _Wildcard_ , like Ren was.

And the Inaba Hanged Man murder case was yet another example of some twisted asshole using that world to murder others for his own gain.

Ren, however, had the article about the mysterious gas leak in the old Junes pulled up on his phone, looking it over. Shirogane Naoto, a legacy detective, and the first ‘Detective Prince’, despite being female. Tatsumi Kanji, the son of the owner of Tatsumi Textiles, that wonderous fabric shop Ren had loved to hang out in back home. Tatsumi-san had always looked so sad whenever he’d asked her if she’d teach him how to sew; he supposed he knew why, now.

Kujikawa Rise, better known as Risette. She’d been a rather famous idol, before she took a sabbatical to Inaba to live with her grandmother for a while. Hanamura Yosuke, the son of the Junes branch manager. Satonaka Chie, second year at Yasogami High, self-proclaimed kung-fu expert. Amagi Yukiko, daughter and heiress of the famous Amagi Inn, Inaba’s crowning jewel. Someone known only as Teddie, a foreigner who’d somehow wound up in Inaba and integrated himself nicely into the community, considering the nice things the obituary had to say about him.

Souji-san’s friends. His _team_.

“My Magician,” the man said, showing Ren an album of photos he’d dug up from…somewhere. He didn’t think the man had left Leblanc since he’d stormed in yesterday, so where…? Whatever, it wasn’t important. What _was_ important were the pictures in front of him, showcasing Souji-san standing side-by-side with a boy Ren’s age, with dyed-brown hair and headphones and a bright grin. Another photo, showing the same boy arguing with someone in a bear mascot costume while wearing a Junes apron. “Hanamura Yosuke.”

Hanamura and Souji-san arm wrestling. Sparring by a riverbank. Toasting with steak skewers from Souzai Daigaku. Choking on the steak skewers from Souzai Daigaku.

“Satonaka Chie, my Chariot.” It shouldn’t be a surprise, but somehow it was when the girl in the photo looked nothing like Ryuji, with short brown hair and a bright green sweater over her Yasogami High uniform. “Next to her is Amagi Yukiko, my High Priestess.” Amagi had long black hair and seemed the epitome of Japanese beauty, nothing like Makoto at all. The photos showed Satonaka and Amagi, arm in arm and wearing yukata, probably enjoying the fireworks festival. Satonaka and Hanamura arguing with each other over a plate of food. Satonaka and Amagi and Souji-san in a kitchen, Satonaka with a perplexed look on her face as the pan in front of her caught fire. Amagi in a pale pink yukata, balancing a huge stack of dishes in what must have been the Inn’s hallways.

The next page had someone who looked more like Ryuji than Yusuke, which meant Ren was thrown when Souji-san said, “Tatsumi Kanji, my Emperor.” Tatsumi’s skull patterned t-shirt and slicked back bleached hair were entirely at odds with the small children clambering all over him like a jungle gym. Tatsumi, holding a pair of knitting needles, a dark blue glove already half done. Tatsumi, red as a beet as he looked at an oblivious blue haired girl half his height.

“The Wheel of Fortune,” Souji-san muttered, fingers tapping a frantic rhythm on his thigh. “Shirogane Naoto.”

“The first Detective Prince.” It was half a question, half a statement, and Souji-san huffed out a small laugh.

“She hated that moniker,” Souji-san informed him as he turned the page. Shirogane stared up at them from a photo of her in ski gear, looking decidedly uncomfortable and unbalanced on her skis. “Not because she was a girl, but because the media made it sound like a role she played, and not a grueling job she worked hard to be good at.” In another photo, Shirogane stared at Tatsumi as he and Satonaka sparred, the faintest hints of red on her cheeks.

The next picture was the mascot costume from before. “My Star, Teddie. He was a Shadow who grew a human ego.”

Ren sputtered in shock. “That’s possible?!”

Souji-san shrugged. “Apparently. I’ve never seen it happen again though, and I’ve been checking.”

There was a picture of Teddie on roller skates, cheerfully cruising away from an irate Satonaka. Another picture of a blond haired, blue eyed boy running away from an angry Amagi. The same boy being chased by both Tatsumi and Hanamura. “He…seems like he was a handful,” Ren decided, looking at the photo of Teddie in his mascot suit, waddling away from a rare irritated Souji-san as fast as his stubby little legs could carry him.

The last teenager in the photobook was Kujikawa Rise. “My Lovers,” Souji-san said, and this was the only time Ren was able to see a parallel between their teams. Kujikawa had been an idol, and it showed in her ability to make any pose seem natural, even when it clearly wasn’t. Most of the photos showed Kujikawa hanging on Souji-san’s arm while he stared down at her with an indulgent smile on his face, but a few of them had her clinging to Tatsumi’s back in a spontaneous piggyback ride, and one had her running after Teddie with her hand raised high in the air, ready to hit the boy when she caught him.

There was a group photo on the last page. Everyone but Teddie was wearing a Yaso High uniform, and it hit Ren all over again that Souji-san’s team was _dead_ , and they’d been his age when they’d died. Not only that, it had only been two days since his own brush with death.

There was no guarantee all the Thieves would make it out of this alive.

Souji-san’s hand was on his shoulder, gently shaking him, when Ren’s awareness returned to him. “Gods, kid, you’ve got to stop doing that to me. I told you my heart couldn’t take anymore.”

“Sorry,” Ren whispered, staring down at the photo. Teddie had a rose pinned to his shirt. Kujikawa was the only one wearing the uniform correctly. Shirogane had her hat pulled down low enough only half her face was showing. Amagi and Satonaka looked like a Christmas advertisement. Tatsumi had lost his jacket, somewhere, and Souji-san was only half wearing his. Hanamura’s was half-unbuttoned, showcasing his non-standard t-shirt. “I guess it just…hit me. If we keep going, I—it was fine, when it was only me on the line. When it was my life and mine alone that might be lost, I was _fine_ with that, if it meant the rest of them were safe, but this…it’s not just mine, anymore. It’s _never_ been only mine, I was just too stupid to see that, and its just hitting me, now, that some of us might not come home and I—I don’t think I could handle that.”

Souji-san moved so he was hugging Ren to his side again, and Ren went, because he needed a hug and he thought Souji-san looked like he needed one too. “You’re doing better than me, Ren.” Souji-san sighed and gently closed the photobook, hiding those eternal smiles. “I didn’t even realize how dangerous it was until we were staring down Izanami, and she—she killed them all.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “Part of me wanted to lose, after that. Part of me wanted to just…let go, and let her win, because what use was a world without them?”

Ren pressed closer, a silent comfort. Souji-san took that as permission to hold tighter, and Ren ignored his aching bruises because this was more important. “And if you already know enough to be scared of that possibility, then you’ll fight all the harder to avoid it. And you’ll do better than me.”

_You’ll have to_ , he didn’t say.

Ren heard it anyways.

* * *

_I failed_ , was Ren’s last thought as he stared up at the sky, red rain pouring down and his teammates _gone_ , wiped away by humanity’s false god. _I failed the Thieves and I failed Souji-san._

And then to wake up in the Velvet Room. To be told _that_. To hear Caroline and Justine, his _Strength_ , ordered to kill him. Well. It was really no surprise that he found the strength to stand, that the cell door behind him _shattered_ under the force of his Will, that Arsène, for the first time since Igor ripped him and Pixie away to fuse Agathion, began to laugh in the back of his mind.

“No,” Ren said as Caroline and Justine began to attack. “I’m not going to play your _game_ anymore. This isn’t a game; it is my life! And I’m done letting you control where it goes!”

“No,” Justine whispered as she grabbed her sister’s hand. “Caroline, this isn’t what we were meant to do. This isn’t who we were meant to be!”

“No,” Lavenza said as she spiraled into being, brilliant blue butterflies weaving through the air. “You do not get to take him, Yaldabaoth.”

“No,” Joker roared as the bastard offered him a deal. “Go crawl back into the hole you came from and hope I don’t follow you there, because if it’s the last thing I do I swear I’ll _kill you_ the next time I see you.”

“No,” Skull snarled as he hauled himself to his feet. “We’ve been fighting for so long, not for ourselves, but so no one has to go through the same kinda crap we went through! Who cares if people think we’re right or not? I’m not gonna let some asshole sippy cup make everything we did meaningless!”

“No,” Panther snapped as she clawed her way up. “Winning, losing, living, dying, none of that matters! All that matters is that I don’t return to my old self; that weak, scared little girl who never stood up for anything, not even what was most important. I will not make that mistake again!”

“No,” Fox decided as he broke free from his restraints. “Even when I desired you all to leave me alone, you continued to impose yourselves upon me, and you saved me. So though the world tells me to leave them, I shall not! I will break them from their cages like you broke me from mine!”

“No,” Queen growled as the door to her cell shattered. “I won’t let the world beat me like this! Even if it takes everything I have, I will come out the winner!”

“No,” Oracle said as she stood up. “I’m not going to run anymore! I ran for so long…from Sojiro, from my mom’s death…I misunderstood everything. But I’m never going to be left in the dark again. And I won’t let anyone else live their lives in darkness either!”

“No,” Noir declared as her cell dissolved. “I am in control of my own life now. You all fought so hard to give me that chance; I refuse to give it up! And I will never, ever stop fighting for you and our friends!”

The real Igor, though just as cryptic as the false one, was much warmer and far more friendly. And he’d given them Morgana with the last of his strength; even if his face still creeped Ren out, Ren would count him among his allies for that reason alone.

When they left the Velvet Room and returned to the real world, Morgana began to glow like a star, catching the attention of the nearby people. They still didn’t see the bones or feel the rain, but they remembered the Thieves. Perhaps that was what Igor meant by ‘hope’.

The temple of the Holy Grail rose above them, an imposing tower of bones and jail cells. And standing there before the path that would take them up was—“Souji-san?!”

“Ren,” the man greeted, smiling calmly like this was just another day of the week for him. “What’s with the get-up?”

“Joker,” Joker corrected him automatically. “And this is just what happens in the Metaverse; it’s a sign of our Will of Rebellion. Our resolve to stand up and fight back.”

Souji-san looked them over before laughing a little. “Well, I’m almost jealous. My team and I had to fight in our school uniforms. It’s a good thing Kanji knew how to sew, or we would have been screwed with how many we managed to destroy.”

“Souji-san, what are you doing here?” Joker asked, eyes flicking from his Fool to the temple where Yaldabaoth waited. “I’m really too busy to talk right now, I’ve got to go kill a god.”

He could have put that more delicately. Maybe not mentioned the god, though what with the way the world was distorted Souji-san had probably already figured that out. Still, he felt bad when Souji-san flinched. The man then took a deep breath, and pulled out a wrapped…something, about as long as his forearm, handing it to Joker. “Ann—”

“Panther,” six voices immediately cut in.

Souji-san looked at them all in irritation before rolling his eyes and correcting himself. “ _Panther_ told me you used knives, in your fights. So I thought I’d loan you…some of Yosuke’s old weapons.”

Joker, who’d been halfway through unraveling the cloth, startled and nearly dropped the bundle. “What?” He looked up at Souji-san in…not alarm, really, but not quite shock either. “Souji-san, no, I can’t take—”

“I expect those back tomorrow,” Souji-san steamrolled over him. “I’ll stop by Leblanc and we can have ourselves a Christmas celebration. So that means you have to come home, understand?”

Oh.

_Oh_.

This was one more promise Souji-san was trying to make him keep.

Joker—Ren—smiled at his Fool, though he knew there was more sadness in it than hope. “Do my best,” he promised, but couldn’t promise any more than that. Souji-san hated liars.

* * *

Watching Sae-san walk away, Ren did his best not to shake as he pulled up that well-known contact. **_Hey_** , his text said. **_The Thieves and I split for the night; you still around Shibuya?_**

**_I’ll be there in five minutes_** , Souji-san promised.

True to his word, it wasn’t more than five minutes before that familiar head of silver hair came weaving towards him through the crowd. “Ren,” the man greeted, one hand resting in his pocket.

Ren’s smile was a little more real, this time, but Souji-san frowned anyways. “Hey, Souji-san,” Ren plowed onwards, because if Souji-san asked he was going to spill everything, and that wasn’t how he wanted to spend his Christmas Eve. “Thanks for letting me borrow these; Hanamura-senpai had good taste in weapons.”

Souji-san accepted the knives, but was still frowning at Ren, and when he crossed his arms over his chest Ren sighed on the inside and quietly gave up. “Alright brat, what’s wrong.” Real concern filled steel grey eyes. “Your team—”

“No no no, they’re all—we’re all fine—I mean, Mona had to-to go back to the Velvet Room,” he _hoped,_ with everything he was, that that was where Morgana was. “But we all—we all made it home, I promise.”

“Then what happened to make you so scared?” Souji-san asked softly, and Ren instantly felt the burn of tears. Scared, huh. Well, considering how the other two times he’d been arrested had gone, that made sense.

“Someone needs to testify against Shido,” he whispered, curling in on himself. Souji-san startled, before pulling him towards a relatively quiet corner of the Scramble. “Someone who…knows about the Metaverse, and Akechi, needs to testify against Shido and it—makes sense, for it to be me. I—they already know my name, from November, and I’m the one whose already got a record; my reputation can’t really get any worse, and even if none of that were true, I’m the _leader_ , it’s my job to keep them _safe_ , I’m just—” _Scared_.

Souji-san’s eyes went soft before he pulled Ren in for a hug. Ren buried his face in Souji-san’s shoulder and tried not to cry. “We’ll figure it out kid,” Souji-san promised, a hand running through his hair. “I know I haven’t been much help, but this, this I can help you with. Sometimes it pays to be an adult, you know.”

And Souji-san hated lies. So Ren clung to that truth with everything that he was. In the inside pocket of his jacket, his lucky charm shifted. “Hey, Souji-san?” Ren asked, voice muffled by the shoulder he refused to come out of. Souji-san gave an affirmative hum to show he was listening. “If you could wish for a miracle, what would you ask for?”

Souji-san stiffened against him. “Hypothetically?” he asked, and his voice sounded a little strangled. In a world where the both of them had fought gods, confirmation of hypotheticals was necessary. Ren nodded, and Souji-san relaxed a bit. Only a bit, though. “I think…you know the answer to that already, little Fool.”

“Yeah, well, assumptions are dumb,” Ren declared, pulling himself away from the hug. His lucky charm felt really, really heavy all of a sudden, and he felt a pressing need to know the answer, _right now_.

Souji-san sighed as he pulled away, looking down at him with a bittersweet smile. “I’d ask for their lives,” he answered, quiet and heartbroken. “Even if…even if they weren’t mine anymore, even if our bonds were lost, if they were alive…that would be my miracle.”

The ema felt like it was weighing him down, and on the wind he thought he could hear something bark.

* * *

Fresh air had never tasted so sweet, Ren decided when he stepped out of the ‘detention center’. The building refused to call itself a prison, even though that was what it was. But whatever. Who even cared? Sojiro pulled up in his stupid yellow car, and his friends were waiting for him in a café that felt more like home than his actual house, and the World and the Fool rested in his hands. He was riding a high and _nothing_ could bring him down.

And when Morgana stepped through the door, well, that was just…everything Ren had ever wanted. Morgana and Shinya and Makoto and Sae-san and Ryuji and Yoshida-san and Iwai and Haru and Boss and Chihaya-san and Ohya and Yusuke and Ann and Hifumi and Takemi-sensei and Kawakami-sensei and Yuuki and Futaba (and no Justice, and that hurt) and Souji-san. All his Arcana were here, and he held the World, and it felt like nothing could stop him.

Haru was still holding Morgana, tears rolling down her face, when it happened. “It’s a miracle, Mona-chan, you’re _home_!”

And Souji-san.

_Flinched_.

Ren felt the world crash down around his ears.

One bond gone hurt _so bad_ , and Souji-san had lost _seven_. How was he still standing? And he looked…so sad. Sad and empty and Ren had seen eyes like that before. They’d been brown, not grey, but still so very sad and tired and _empty_ , empty enough that she’d _thrown herself off the roof_ —

Ren was more scared of that look than he’d been of a god.

* * *

He wasn’t exactly… _proud_ , of his new habit of texting Souji-san every morning and evening, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. Especially as the days crept closer and closer to May twentieth. Ren would be going back to Inaba; not home, not really, not anymore. Not when home was the scent of coffee and curry, and a mattress propped up on old crates and faith, and an outdated CRTV that belonged in a scrap heap. _Home_ was Tokyo, where Ryuji knew the best running paths and Ann knew the best sweet shops.

_Home_ , for Souji-san, didn’t quite exist anymore, and the closer it got to the day Souji-san’s world fell to pieces, the more nervous Ren got.

He was pretty sure Souji-san knew. Wildcards, after all, were excellent readers of people, and Ren was being rather transparent.

Still, everything had to end sometime, and Ren’s year of probation ended with little fanfare. Little fanfare, and lots of gifts.

The yellow scarf Morgana had worn in the metaverse. Makoto’s old Buchimaru calculator (he was going to get weird looks in math class next year, he just knew it). A handmade handkerchief from Haru. ‘Desire and Hope’ from Yusuke (he was going to have to mail that one, no way would it fit on the train). Sojiro’s recipe book, the one Wakaba had written for him (Ren had tried not to cry, and utterly failed). Ann’s first official photobook. The sports watch synced to Ryuji’s, so they could still compete and train together even miles apart. The promise list he’d made with Futaba. The red tarot deck from Chihaya-san. The key to the Velvet Room he should have been given at the beginning, from Lavenza. The gecko pin that marked him a member of Iwai and Kaoru’s family (he’d immediately pinned it to the collar of his jacket, and Kaoru had cried). The dog tag with his name engraved on it from Takemi-sensei (was that supposed to be a joke? He wasn’t sure). ‘Becky’s’ old business card from Kawakami-sensei, with the promise that she’d always answer his calls and do her best to help. Ohya’s plethora of notes on the Phantom Thieves and Shido (Ren thought that maybe she was just using him as a convenient trash can, but he was keeping these for posterity). Shinya’s old game controller (Shinya had called him ‘Ren-nii’, and Ren was really tired of crying today but he couldn’t seem to stop). The kosha piece from Hifumi’s spare shogi set. The first draft of Yuuki’s documentary. The fanciest pen Ren had ever seen, from Yoshida-san. Sae-san’s new business card, the one that said ‘lawyer’ instead of ‘prosecutor’.

And, from Souji-san, an old pair of well-loved glasses, angled and grey. Ren immediately swapped them out for the ones he was wearing. “How do I look?” he joked, and Souji-san’s smile was tired and small but real, and Ren felt a bit better about leaving tomorrow.

“Like you found the truth you were looking for.” O…kay, that was kind of random, but whatever. “You excited to be heading home?”

Ren sighed, leaning back against the bench to stare up at the infuriatingly blue sky. “Not really,” he admitted. “Inaba is…not home, for me, anymore.”

“Mm,” Souji-san hummed, mirroring Ren’s pose. “I get it. You found yourself here, in Tokyo, and now you have to return to where you came from, but you’re not who you were so you know you won’t fit. So, don’t.”

Ren turned to look at Souji-san. “Don’t…what? I’m gonna need a little more info than _that_ , Souji-san.”

Souji-san’s eyes were closed, reliving a memory Ren would never understand. “Don’t fit yourself to the world; move the world to fit around you. That’s what it means to reach the end of the Fool’s Journey.”

“’You are no longer an existence that wanders alone’,” Ren mused.

Souji-san huffed out a laugh. “Did your Attendant tell you that?”

“Yours too?” he asked instead of answering, and they shared matching looks of fond exasperation for blue-clad non-humans who had an annoying habit of being frustratingly cryptic.

They stayed like that until the sun started setting, and Ren had no more excuses to give.

* * *

Wandering through Inaba was…weird. People whispered about him behind his back, but honestly, he’d gotten used to that in Shujin. School was going to suck, but it was always going to suck without Ann and Ryuji and Yuuki to talk to. His parents were the same as ever, cold and distant where Boss was warm and kind. He missed Souji-san the most, though. The man had known what it meant to be a Wildcard, and that was something even the other Thieves hadn’t been able to give Ren.

Almost on instinct, Ren turned into Tastuhime Shrine. He stopped short at the sight of the fox sitting in the steps in front of the main hall. “Hi,” he said dumbly, and the fox barked at him and— _Ongyo-Ki stirred_. “Oh,” he said just as dumbly. “You’re Souji-san’s Hermit.” Of course, Souji-san had other bonds; he was a Wildcard, he had to have had twenty, at least. He may have lost nearly half of what he had, but he still had _some_. Ren had probably even run into them, over the years, and just not known.

The fox barked again, staring up at him like she was _expecting_ something from him, and slowly, part of him believing this wasn’t actually happening, he reached into his pocket and pulled out the ema, holding it out to her. She nosed at the aged wood, looking it over critically, before sending him a disapproving glance. “Do you not want it back?” he asked, mystified. “What am I supposed to do with it then?”

She turned and pointed towards the wall where other ema hung. “Do you…want me to make a wish?” Somehow, this was not the weirdest conversation he’d had in the last year.

The fox barked again, sitting at his feet and looking like she had all the time in the world. She’d apparently been waiting for him to make a wish for five years, and suddenly she couldn’t wait five minutes. Still, there was…only one wish he really wanted.

He pulled out the pen Yoshida-san had given him and wrote it on the ema before handing the wooden plaque to the fox. Now that it had words on it, she was more than happy to take it off his hands to hang it, her tail swishing in pleasure as she did so.

Something in the air felt heavy, attention from something _big_ suddenly focused on the shrine. Shivering, he turned tail and fled, his wish echoing in his head.

_Please. Someone give Souji-san a miracle._

* * *

He was almost unsurprised to find himself in the Velvet Room. He was definitely surprised to find it…not a prison. “But of course, Trickster,” Lavenza said softly, her eyes crinkled from the force of her amusement. “This room is but a reflection of your heart, and yours alone. The imposter forced his will upon yours, but you fought back, and so the Velvet Room has become what it always should have been.”

It was a train car, traveling through thick fog. One of those old-fashioned railway cars seen in American Westerns, with many windows and the fancy dining areas that seemed rather impractical for a moving vehicle. It still seemed rather impractical to him, even though the magic of the Velvet Room meant there wasn’t much movement going on. The table he was sitting at had seats of blue velvet, and Lavenza sat next to him, the Compendium on her lap and her legs swinging freely. Igor sat across from him, bloodshot eyes and bloodless grin still just as creepy as when Yaldabaoth had worn his face. On the table between them sat the ema. _His_ ema, with his wish on display for anyone to see.

“I remember this guest,” Igor informed him, one spidery hand placing a finger on the wood where Souji-san’s name was. “He sought the truth that lie at the core of every heart, and paid a most terrible price in the process.” Igor focused on Ren, and Ren froze as he got the same sense he got earlier, at the shrine; something _big_ had suddenly fixated on him. “Tell me, Trickster, what would you give to fulfill this wish of yours?”

And it was dumb to say and even dumber not to even think about it, but all Ren could remember was empty, empty grey and he said, “Anything. Everything.”

* * *

The movement of the train car jolted Narukami Yu awake, glasses nearly slipping off his face.

**Author's Note:**

> Surprise?  
> In our next installment, Souji and 'Yu' move to Inaba! It promises to be fun and also full of pain and angst.  
> (Insert evil laughter of your choice here)


End file.
